I hereby declare free membership for the first ten disciples in my new religion. Kids, you're going to learn this stuff at school one day, just like I did once upon a time. Now's your chance to be part of something better organised than Christianity, with better food than Judaism, and fewer rules than Islam.
At the moment, we have the following people:
Founder Member:
1. Me (Smiter of Iniquity)
Disciples (in alphabetical order):
1. Smiter Chris (the Fabulous, and second of our flock to stop breathing)
2. Delano (the First Disciple)
3. Flash (Purveyor of DVDs)
4. Smiter Ian (first of our flock to stop breathing)
5. Jeremy (the Prognosticator)
6. Jonathan (the Electric)
7. Ricky (the Revelator)
8. Shylo (the Voice of Archer)
9. Steven (the Doubter)
Clergy:
1. Marinus (High Priestess)
2. Toni (Master Inquisitor)
Honorary Members:
1. Elton John (Official Bitch)
2. Simon Cowell (Vice Bitch)
3. Joseph Kynaston Reeves (Recogniser of Idiots)
There is still one position left for the one-time free special offer of SOI Disciple! Join now!